In Kingman, AZ I first made the prediction that I would meet my next boyfriend in Albuquerque – A prediction I made over the months to a handful of friends, of course to intense teasing as I neared Albuquerque. To make an all too common story short(er), my prediction somehow came true. I don’t quite get it myself – but there we are. I am completely InLove with a man who seems to love me as deeply. Infatuated, shocked that somehow we want the same – to be together! I used to question if it would ever truly happen for me? Would it ever be that the person I really wanted to be near would also be the same who wanted to be near me? And so, I am a slight bit in awe that the rug has been pulled out from under my feet.
When I arrived in Albuquerque I quickly started to date a guy I had talked to for a few weeks online. The dates turned to both of us wanting to see each other a lot – and then some more. And yes, I am head over heals, deeply in-love with a very, very sweet man! My sweetie’s name is Preston, he is incredibly sweet, funny as all get-out and we are a good match! We want many of the same things in life – to live close to nature, we love camping, the waters, horses and cats, we have the same sense of humor (yes, for those who thought my humor was just a bit over the top – watch out, Preston takes it even further and we build on each others humor), we want a strong community, involvement and community spirit – a life of passion, and there is certainly no shortage of passion between us.
So, yes, I must admit and confess, I have been preoccupied while in Albuquerque. I initially had three weeks to stay with Adam in south valley, whom I met while here for Gathering of Nations – but have now moved to another couch surfing location in NE Albuq. While I made several attempts to get in contact with media during the three weeks, they were in all honesty less than half-hearted. I felt torn and completely unsure of where I wanted to go next – what was right? I am deeply infatuated with The Trail, and that never changed. The Trail has changed me in ways I could never have imagined – but I am also, as we know, out of money, and my cats cant stay where they are at – I need to go and get them, and get them some place safe for the rest of the walk. I cant handle that my babies are not safe for any longer of this walk – it is time to go to California, get them and get them into safe harbor. And Yes, certainly, staying here and being close to my new Love was and is incredibly tempting. And so, confusion set into my heart. What do I want? Have I gotten what I wanted / needed from this Trail? Time to settle down? Or, God, No, No, The Trail is Sacred. I don’t want to stop now – I am not done yet. Round and round in circles. It seemed the choices I had was either settle down now, get my cats and be near Preston or continue to walk and have a long distance relationship till I am done walking. And so the confusion and doubt kept me from being serious about outreach to media and corporations.
Preston was and is deeply supportive of my dreams, passion and life – he would never stand in my way, and I knew that. He likes a strong, independent woman, and respects me and my abilities. It was me who was torn. As the relationship strengthened I also wanted more decisions and work to be “ours”, as opposed to “mine”, which requires conversations, sharing and openness – all things to develop in a relationship, but given that the relationship is new, also something that forces us to stop, listen and pay more attention, we do not yet know each other’s styles. I am of course still in charge of my life, but we are now clearly, officially and vocally a couple. We have had to vocally stand up for ourselves as a couple, as some (white) people Preston knows seems to have an problem with bi-racial relationships – something neither of us have room for in our lives. Yes, I am white – Preston is not; if someone have a problem with that I suggest keeping that problem to yourselves!
It seems I completely overlooked one option – mainly because I did not want to assume anything about Preston’s desires – but this weekend he told me he really, really wants to come with me on The Trail. Wow, my heart skipped a beat and my brain jumped three steps to the right! This was and is unexpected to me – but it sure feels wonderful! For me, The Trail all of a sudden came alive in all its gorgeous vibrancy again! I can’t hardly wait to share the Sacredness of The Trail with my sweetie – and I have no doubt that his world will be transformed as well; as mine has been transformed by all of you!
So, this is what’s happened and what’s next! I have lost my head once more, been busy sinking into the arms and the love of an amazing man, and now getting my feet under me for media attention / fund raising. I hope all of you will support me as you have throughout this incredible Trail.
At this stage I believe it will be the end of July or very early August before I am back on The Trail – this time as part of a couple, together with my Sweetheart!
With much Love!